Sunday, November 16, 2008

Me...


HE said You have so much to give...

I said I know...

HE said You have so much to give...

I said I'm scared...

HE said You have so much to give...

I said why do I all the sudden have an overwhelming peace within me...?

HE said You have so much to give...

I said I feel you. Why can't I feel you all the time...?

HE said You have so much to give...

I said I'm not sure...

HE said You have so much to give...

I said I don't know how...

HE said You have so much to give...

I said I KNOW...

HE said why are You not giving it?

Monday, November 10, 2008

Brain Dump

- Cannot believe Thanksgiving is almost two weeks away! Where has the year gone?

- December 7th will be our 6 month Anniversary... Again, where has the year gone?

- Would like my body better if it was more in shape and firm and did not have any fat on it!

- Kind of struggling with how to figure out how to pay for Christmas gifts, 2 I-Phones and decorations for our apartment. SIGH

- So need more jeans... Only have two pair. One does not fit me that well and the other one has a hole in the knee because I have worn them so much. Another Sigh

- Evaluations are coming up at work. I am excited because I need feedback to know how I am doing but I also know I will be really nervous when that day comes. Although a raise is definitely coming my way I have been told! :-)

- Going to visit my sister this weekend... YAY! I am very excited. I have not seen or talked to her in a while and I miss her so much! Definitely major catching up to do.

- Need to start my Christmas shopping. It is sneaking up on me and its sneaking up on me fast!

- We basically have decided that we are moving at the end of our lease. This will be the 6th time I will be moving since 2004 when I moved to Charlotte to go to college... Oh Lord help me!

- Michael and I have also decided a work out plan:
~ Wake up at 4:45 in the morning
~ Start work out at 5 am for an hour
~ Come back at 6 am
~ Get ready for work
~ Leave for work
~ Normal routine throughout the day
~ Go to bed at 9
~ Start all over again
Yeah... Let's actually call this the "Kill Me Now" plan. We will need lots of prayer and dedication. Wait! Positive attitude. We can do it! We got this! :-) :-(

- The Holidays are so busy for us. Lots of traveling on the weekends and spending time with family. I am excited

- Why do I always crave chocolate... and I mean ALWAYS! It's like an addiction.

- We just got a king size bed from Michael's family. It is so huge! I feel like I am in a sea of bed but I LOVE it!

- Really can't wait till I get time off from work and that is not including weekends.

- So glad the election is over. The commercials/ads were driving me crazy!!! So glad I don't have to hear "I am ... and I approve this message" anymore!

- Too many shows to watch on TV.

- How in the world do I all the sudden like Red Wine???

- Reading a book called "Rachel's Tears." Learning a lot about this young girls life before she was killed in the Columbine High School shooting. She had so much for passion for God and to have a relationship with him. How do I get to that point where no one else matters but Him?

- Hope this week goes by fast. Already ready for Friday!

Have a great week! :-)

Who's in Control?

The election this year was extremely hard for me. I could not decide whose name I would give my vote to and put my faith in for the upcoming four years. Granted, politics has never been and never will be my cup of tea but that has never stopped me from knowing who I would give my vote to! I was very much torn between the two candidates this year. Not only that, there became an overwhelming sense of importance, concern and worry for me whose feet would land and be planted in the highest office for America. I have always known the importance of voting but I never expected that importance to turn into fear. This year it did!

I feel that God had placed something inside of me this time around. Something in my spirit was stirring. I am still not sure what that feeling is but I do know that God never intended it to turn into frustration and judgement because of fear. I was reminded of that when I received an email from my Aunt Angie. It was titled "Who's in Control?" My mind finally went YES a point of view of this election from a Godly perspective and that's exactly what it was. In the email was a verse from Isaiah 40:

21 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
Has it not been told you from the beginning?
Have you not understood since the earth was founded?
22 He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,
and spreads them out like a tent to live in.
23 He brings princes to naught
and reduces the rulers of this world to nothing.
24 No sooner are they planted,
no sooner are they sown,
no sooner do they take root in the ground,
than he blows on them and they wither,
and a whirlwind sweeps them away like chaff.
25 "To whom will you compare me?
Or who is my equal?" says the Holy One.
26 Lift your eyes and look to the heavens:
Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host one by one,
and calls them each by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing.
27 Why do you say, O Jacob,
and complain, O Israel,
"My way is hidden from the Lord;
my cause is disregarded by my God?"
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 But those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary;
they will walk and not be faint.
"To God be the Glory and may we rest in Him knowing that no one comes to power on this earth without His permission and for His purposes."
- Aunt Angie
The whole time I was praying for God to show me who to vote for it was like I was expecting him to make the decision for me or to show me who the "right person" was for President. In the process of waiting for him to answer me the frustration and judgement inside of me kept growing stronger. The verse above and the email that I received was his answer to me. It reminded me that no matter who I think is the right or wrong candidate God already has them chosen. Instead of me looking to count on them to lead and be the leader of America he wants me to look to him and put my trust and faith in him. The verse above reminds me that he is my leader, our leader, our Presidents leader, America's leader, the world's leader.
I have a whole new perspective now. That feeling inside still remains but instead of it being fear it is now peace knowing that whatever God has in store for this country and the world he is in control. It is still important for me to always vote for who I think the President should be for everyone needs to know what they stand for. However, regardless of who steps foot in that office whether I voted for them or not they will always be in my prayers and have my respect. I will not be looking to them to lead but I will be looking to God to lead them.